The Big Four of Mental Healing: An Inner Journey, Counseling, Medicine and Grace

My degree is in psychology, with some graduate courses in learning disabilities and training in administering, interpreting and leading workshops on the Meyer’s-Briggs Type Indicator. But I have never done any counseling, so what I have to say needs to be taken with a grain of salt.
I have had counseling at some crises times in my life. Some of it was not helpful at all, but some actually helped enough to bring about major change. To me, Psychology often seems now aimed at putting a label on people and experimenting with pills until either some pill works more than it hurts, or they get over whatever it was on their own!
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been helped by pills, but I’ve been helped as much or more by reading, working at developing inner awareness, and getting feedback from a counselor. There was a face book post about pills not curing anything, but helping us keep it together enough to work through our inner conflict. That resonates with me. Though I do recognize that in the case of some serious mental illnesses, pills are a critical part of keeping personal demons at bay. Although chemical imbalances may play a part in our problems, along the way we have usually learned responses to life that no longer work for us. Sometimes it takes changing our chemistry, our mental attitudes and our habitual behaviors.
One of the problems I, and many others, have is that our first response to the outer world is emotional. We operate on a feeling level. We are capable of using logic and reason, but that is not our first response. (And sometimes, not our second or third or……)

All too often we identify with our feelings. We are sad or happy, PERIOD.
From our viewpoint there is no end in sight. This makes any feeling seem overwhelming.
Whether it’s despair or pure joy, if you feel/think it’s going to last forever, that’s delusional thinking and it’s going to seriously handicap you in dealing with reality.
We have to learn to tell ourselves,” This is just a feeling and feelings change.” That is the nature of feelings, when we don’t get stuck there by delusional thinking. Our emotions and our reason need to hold hands, look each other in the eye, and talk!
Henri Nouwen speaks to this, “Don’t identify with your feeling. It is not the whole of you. Instead pastor it gently.”
And that takes grace.

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About Eileen

Mother of five, grandmother of eleven, great-grandmother of seven, 1955 -1959 Rice University in Houston, TX. Taught primary grades; Was Associate Post Director of Religious Education at Ft. Campbell, KY; Consultant on the Myers/Briggs Type Indicator; Presently part time Administrative Assistant/Bookkeeper for Architect husband of fifty-seven years. Blog: Laughter: Carbonated Grace

Posted on June 18, 2014, in Answered Prayer, B4Peace, Healing, Love, Personality, relationships, Spiritual, Suffering and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. What would you say-
    If this poem’s for you, then what would you say? Would you love it, or hate it, or throw it away? Would you be by my side, or be on your way? Are you here for true love, or just here to play? Would you hug me, and kiss me, and tell me to stay? Please say that you would, for that’s what I pray. I would hold you, and love you, and say it’s okay. If this poem’s for you, then what would you say?

    Swamp Water-
    Shallows of water enticing
    Dark waters scary and frightening
    Lagoons of Cypris so merky
    Mourned looking trees standing lonely
    Droopy old Swamp Oaks of somber
    Clay soils, oil-like, marshy
    Pink Euodias seeded softly
    Perfect for wetlands of beauty

    Wording-
    Grown from the negative
    I try to spread the neutral.
    Embrace the truth, the soul within,
    generate better futures.
    The life I chose, I stand alone
    but truly we are one.
    Together united
    there’s no need for fighting
    connected we’ve all won;
    But in this notion comes a realization
    we all have also lost.
    Well there is the balance
    a mutual alliance no winner
    or losers, the center, the middle,
    all of us are one

    {Untitled}-
    Grown from the negative
    I try to spread the neutral.
    Embrace the truth, the soul within,
    generate better futures.
    The life I chose, I stand alone
    but truly we are one.
    Together united
    there’s no need for fighting
    connected we’ve all won;
    But in this notion comes a realization
    we all have also lost.
    Well there is the balance
    a mutual alliance no winner
    or losers, the center, the middle,
    all of us are one

    Self Worth-
    You could tell what your self-worth is but it isn’t even worth the time it takes you to say it. You put cards inside your sleeve so you can play them, and people think that’s cool until you betray them too. Wow, deja vu, you did it again and all your close friends knew that one day they would drift away because they all knew that you would pull the wool over their eyes and try to cheat them with your small, white lies. Stacks pile up made of your false information and begin to topple so it starts to get hard to juggle your own delusions. The model citizen they saw is gone so people start to avoid seeing you because your lies drove them to truth. There you are sitting alone in a dark room and all you really have is your opinion of self-worth.

    Spare Yourself of The Word-
    Hey! Now you be careful with that four letter word. I personally don’t believe that that concept is real. If you ever say it then I know you are lying or have misinterpreted it’s meaning. Well, the real question is of which word I am speaking. The word is “hate” and if you say it then I know you are faking. Now let me tell you about the word and it’s meaning. It’s an extreme dislike with passion. Imagine if you had a button that would completely destroy or kill the concept of your choosing. I could only imagine to push it if it was for mosquitos or something, but to say it on the daily is ignorant and uncharming. People throw the word around like it means nothing, and you insert it into sentences to assert prejudice opinions. “Dislike” is the meaning in which you try to convey, so spare yourself of the ignorance of the word of hate.

    Fine lines-
    Words are very delicate so check you educate, demeanor, your manor.
    The liars of enlightenment, false profits desire to feed their egos and gain riches from those priceless word; words oh so elegant.
    Fine lines, at times, are blurred by the selfish perceptions, the peoples opinions that are easily set askew.
    Obtuse triangles, unbalanced, uneven powers between the truth within, us people, and the selfishly greedy ones who think they are better.
    I at least advocate acute, but equilateral balance of power is the goal.
    Self control is one way to help the whole.
    It all starts within so help your friends to understand the epiphanies, awakening, and inspiration of all that’s around us.
    So bend your perception, be fluid of others opinions because life is a changing, ever growing process; accept it.

    Hollowed Heart-
    Are you satisfied again.
    My heart is being hollowed from the outside in.
    The source of my wounds is staring me in the face.
    So what is this deep pain my friend? Friend…
    Well, once we were lovers and we shared everything.
    Our common warmth, together, has reached it’s end.
    Disagreements started fights that changed the course of our lives.
    Breaking attachment hurts, it was never love to begin with.
    Lust is the true reason why we were together.
    I thought I was your yang and you were my yin.
    I guess our relationship was only skin deep.

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