Vanity, the Great Motivator

I’ve written about being a charter member of the Church of Devout Cowardice and how in my sixties, I finally decided I might as well risk riding down a luge on a tour in Austria, since I was already in pain and in a wheelchair.

Recently, I turned seventy-five about the same time my great-grandson turned sixteen . I suggested we celebrate together by riding a new zip line in our area. But, he must have inherited my genes and joined my old church, because he said, “NO WAY!”

Then to my dismay, I discovered that the upper age limit is sixty-five. I considered trying to get a fake ID, but thought perhaps that was a bad example for my great-grandchildren.

Suddenly, I ugly laughed out loud, remembering that a few weeks ago, I had done something with a lot more potential for serious injury than riding a zip line.

We were invited to go out to dinner and the symphony with some young and glamorous  family members, so I bought my first pair of high heels in about twenty-years.  Even after several days of practice walking in them, I had to cling to my husband’s arm most of the evening. (I left my walker at home. Somehow, it seemed to defeat the effect of the high heels.)

Adventure has nothing on vanity as a motive for risk taking.


About Eileen

Mother of five, grandmother of eleven, great-grandmother of five. 1955 -1959 Rice University in Houston, TX. Taught primary grades; Was Associate Post Director of Religious Education at Ft. Campbell, KY; Consultant on the Myers/Briggs Type Indicator; Presently part time Administrative Assistant/Bookkeeper for Architect husband of fifty-nine years.

Posted on February 19, 2013, in Humor. Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. Oh, Eileen, how I can relate. When we were in Florida and “going out” and getting “dressed up” I, too, attempted heels. I even purchased the “safer” model where the heel ran from the ball of the foot to the heel. Still couldn’t do it. Decided I was tall enough without adding a couple of extra precarious inches. I own only two dresses: one black number for funerals and one for New Years Eve. I certainly wouldn’t want to make a grand entrance at a funeral and there’s no way I can dance in heels on New Years Eve….the shoes with heels will probably make the next trip to the Goodwill store.

  2. Ha! You are having teenagerhood again in reverse!

  3. I am so impressed. I gave up heels 30 years ago. Are you hoping to die young and leave a beautiful corpse or did you “really” think you could walk in them? Even if it’s early senility, I admire your gumption. Go Girl! Myra

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